Pop Goes the Weasel | страница 130

Jake looked stunned, but Helen had to ask the question anyway.

‘Did you tell her?’

‘No, of course not. A hundred times, no.’

‘Have you told anyone else? Anyone who might know her, who might have a big mouth?’

‘No, why on earth would I do that? What happens is between us and no one else, you know that.’

Helen stared at the floor. Suddenly the weight of the day’s events caught up with her and she started to cry. Furious with herself, she kept her head bowed, refusing to show her weakness, but her shoulders started to shake. Things had gone so horribly, horribly wrong and most of it was down to her own weakness and stupidity. Was she always destined to be on the losing side?

Jake crossed the room and enveloped her in a warm hug. It felt good. Some people despised her, others questioned her, still others thought she was odd. But Jake had never judged her, had always cared for her, despite the unusual nature of their relationship. Helen had been starved of unconditional love all her life, but she realized in that moment that this was what Jake wanted to give her.

She had always kept him at a distance, even when he’d signalled his desire to get closer to her. Which is why it surprised him as much as Helen when she finally looked up and said:

‘Stay.’

Sunlight flooded through the thin curtains. Charlie felt the warmth of the new day on her face and slowly opened her eyes. Memories, thoughts and feelings swirled round her fuzzy head, then suddenly she turned over, anxious to see if she’d dreamed it or not. But Steve wasn’t there – he hadn’t come home last night. It was no dream.

Charlie had tried ringing him repeatedly but it had gone straight to voicemail. Was he ok? Had something happened to him? She was sure Steve wouldn’t have left her. His stuff was all here and, besides, he was a bigger man than that. He would never walk out without an explanation.

So where was he? And why hadn’t he come home? After he had issued his ultimatum, Charlie had asked for time to think. She desperately wanted them to be together, to be a happy family, but to give up her career, give up everything she’d fought to achieve, was a huge sacrifice. But would any of it be worth it without Steve by her side? This was a circle Charlie couldn’t square.

Perhaps she’d never understood the depth of his grief over the baby they’d lost. Steve had had a name in mind for it if it was a boy. He had teased her with that when she was first pregnant, refusing to let her in on the secret. He had never mentioned it subsequently, despite Charlie’s attempts to get him to talk about it. After a while she’d stopped asking and because he was so solid, so self-contained, perhaps she had underestimated the effect it had had on him.